Hello again! I pray that all is well and all will be well in your lives.
This week we’ll go over the fifth commandment, which says:
(5) — “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
In addition to family, there is a core group of people who I pray for. People who I believe God put or had pass through my life at some point. So, one time I was praying for them and it was going on as a calm prayer. That is until I made the mistake of saying/referred to them as “my” souls, like: “please watch over my souls”. The atmosphere of the prayer changed and I felt very uneasy. God is very possessive about his souls! I apologized and corrected my prayer to “please watch over the souls that you’ve entrusted to me”.
Even Jesus gave an account to the Father for the souls of the twelve disciples. Please read the full chapter of John 17: Jesus’ prayer in the garden of Gethsemane.
While I was with them in the world, I kept them in thy name: those that thou gavest me I have kept, and none of them is lost, but the son of perdition; that the scripture might be fulfilled. — John 17:12 (KJV)
All souls are God’s period. You can neither sell your soul, nor can the devil/anyone own your soul. When you die your soul returns to God for him to do as he sees fit.
Behold, all souls are mine; as the soul of the father, so also the soul of the son is mine: the soul that sinneth, it shall die. — Ezekiel 18:4 (KJV)
Why did I bring this up, and what does it have to do with honoring our parents? As we’ve reviewed in the past, while these commandments are universal, they are still directly addressed to particular audiences. Now, this commandment absolutely applies to kids and little children, but it’s not directly addressed to them. They, in general, do not read the bible. It must be taught to them, in which case they already must have some level of reverence for their parents.
First, this commandment is directly addressed to people who are of age of accountability and older. And, notice the commandment does not say obey. As I minor you should always obey your parents in all things that are good and right: things that are not against God, a danger to you or the law. When you become an adult and you disagree with them or they are wrong, you have the right to do so, but let them know in a respectful way. Even if you have to correct or rebuke your parents, do it respectfully.
Remember, our parents are human. They don’t have all the answers, but if they are good parents, they are trying their best. You think you know yourself, but they know the real you. They see the long term and distance outcome of things. Your own choices that would ultimately make you unhappy and/or paths that would lead to your destruction. Ex: as a child I wanted a particular toy so badly for Christmas. When Christmas came around, I did not get the toy. I wasn’t angry, never showed any contempt, or try a guilt trip, but I was very hurt inside; I’m pretty sure they knew though. Looking back now as an adult, not only would that toy have distracted me from my studies, it would have further stunted my social skills.
We should honor our parents because they know, see and do these things. Namely, we should honor them by not making their job harder than it already is (including guilt trips), because in the end, they are looking after your soul and must answer to God for how they raised you.
Second, while it’s not directly addressed to parents, parents must also be accountable for the authority/position given to them. Children are innocent souls that God has entrusted to you. At some point, they will have their own desires and life that may not always agree with you. Your job is to raise them right, not run their lives or live vicariously through them. Just the same as a child should not guilt trip you, you should not guilt trip them. Doing these will lead your child to resent you.
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. — Ephesians 6:4 (NIV)
Last, and there is only one commandment for this post, because it’s a lot to think about. I am not a parent, so it would be inappropriate for me to tell anyone how to raise a child. The best I can do is pull from other sources with experience. Several decades ago, the Police Department of Houston, Texas, published 12 rules for raising a delinquent child. I think its warning is still relevant for today.
12 rules for raising a delinquent child
- Begin with infancy to give the child everything he wants. By doing this, he will grow up to believe the world owes him a living.
- When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. This will make him think it’s cute.
- Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he is 21 and then let him decide for himself.
- Avoid the use of the word “wrong”, this will give him a guilt complex. This will condition him to believe later, when he is arrested for stealing a car, that society is against him, and he is being persecuted.
- Pick up everything he leaves around…books, shoes, clothes. Do everything for him so that he will experience in throwing all responsibility on others.
- Let him read any printed matter he can get his hands on. Be careful that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let your child’s mind feast on garbage.
- Quarrel frequently in the presence of your child. In this way, he will not be too shocked when your home breaks up.
- Give the child all the spending money he wants. Never let him earn his own. Why should he have things as tough as you had them?
- Satisfy his every craving for food, drink, and comfort. See that every sensual desire is gratified. Denial may lead to harmful frustration.
- Take his part against neighbors, teachers, and policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.
- When he gets in real trouble, comfort yourself by saying, “I never could do anything with him.”
- Prepare for a life of grief. You will be likely to have it.
May God bless and keep all who read this.
May God bless and keep all brothers and sisters, new and old, in the faith in his name.
With his love and mine,
Chrom